eidxiety | Sticks & Bones // IC Inbox

[Ohhh is he hearing this right? He cannot possibly be hearing this right. Is this another hallucination? Does he care if it is or isn't? He doesn't think he does, honestly.

He rolls onto his side, propped up on one elbow. Elsword is so cute... he's always been cute, but Ain's realising he very rarely gets to see the younger man flustered like this. It's not as though their group had much time for romance, and what bouts of sexual tension they all shared were often interrupted by tasks that needed doing. All in all, it's a rare day to see their leader so nervous.]

I don't have to, but I want to~. Is that a good enough reason?

[Ain might be overthinking just how to kiss the other man, meanwhile. He's wanted to do this for so long and somehow didn't think he'd get this far.

He flops down again, scoots over, and gently takes Elsword's face in his hands.]

Just tell me if you change your mind, okay?

[And how is he going to tell you, Ain?? His mouth is going to be at least slightly occupied here in a moment!

The irony doesn't quite reach him, though. He leans in, giving Elsword only another couple seconds to potentially back out, and softly presses their lips together.

Ohhhh God he's wanted this for so long, it really does feel like he's dreaming.]

[ Oh. You know, Elsword wasn't expecting Ain to be excited. Like, perhaps nervous, or even maybe upset that he'd brought it up at all. Ain doesn't usually get angry with him about things, of course, but this is still something a bit more personal than things they usually talk about. And, well, another reason Elsword can be considered immature, right? Hm.

He tries to think of a good response, but he's floundering a bit here. There's certainly thoughts happening, but they're so scattered and none of them ever finish before moving on to the next one, so he's just sort of...????????? He's doing his best. So, eventually, he just brings himself to nod.

And then, as their lips touch, Elsword expects his thoughts to calm, but... nope. They get louder. More frantic. Where should he put his hands? In his lap? On Ain's shoulders? On his waist? Is that too forward? Should he have taken measures to make his breath smell better? He brushes his teeth, but maybe not as often as he should. Wait, should he be holding totally still or moving his lips? He hasn't done this before, isn't it, like, more than just...

👄👄 but touching???

??????????????????????????????????????? ]

Edited 2025-08-18 04:41 (UTC)

[And while Elsword is understandably nervous and unsure — what's he supposed to do, apply his same combat bravado to something as intimate as kissing? — Ain is giddy and excited. His tail is wagging, audibly thumping against the mattress as he presses against Elsword. Lips... And body, shh. Let him have this.

(It's not like he doesn't lay on the man whenever they're camping out or sleeping in his room, but still.)

Ain won't be mean and evil though. He won't try to force a make out or anything. It's just a little smooch, slow and lingering because Ain is melting into it even if Elsword is just laying there confused. After a minute, he'll give the other some mercy, backing off with a smile.

His face is red, for all he's pretending to be suave about this.]

There. Was that what you were looking for?

[ It ends, and Elsword isn't sure how long it's been. It felt simultaneously like .1 seconds and like a whole day??? What's happening?

Huh? Was it what he was looking for??? What... WAS he looking for????????? Hold on, he's processing, give him a moment-

Elsword doesn't immediately respond, just sort of opening his mouth with no sound coming out before he suddenly blurts: ] Wait... no! No, no, we have to forget that one, too! I-... I'm supposed to be the one kissing you!!

[He loves you so much holy shit—

Ain laughs. Softly, politely, but he still laughs, a thumb caressing Elsword's cheek.]

Is that so~? Okay. I'll let you take the lead, then.

[He even scoots back a little, to let Elsword come to him. His hands are still on the other man's face, so it's not like he's gone far, but still.]

... [ And Ain is just going to go along with it, just like that? That's surprising, but... Elsword cannot complain. It's been a while since he's seen Ain genuinely smile. Perhaps it's a smile because he's enjoying Elsword's fluster and inexperience (no, he just loves you, boy-), but that doesn't bother him any. A smile is a smile, regardless, right?

He does fidget a bit, as his own hands finally remove themselves from his side to rest on Ain's own face - mirroring him, in a sense. ]

You just can't make fun of me. I don't... I haven't... [ Huffs. How does he say "I haven't had time for stuff like this" without sounding dumb. It's not like Ain doesn't know that, anyway. He's been with Elsword since, well, the age he'd even start to think about the ✨scandalous activity✨ of (checks notes) holding hands.

He will eventually lean in, though. His mind once again reels. Isn't it fucked up to be wearing armor still while he goes to kiss Ain? He was just relaxing, right? Why does he still have it on? Should he take it off? Would that be weird in the middle of this? Would that give the wrong impression? Should they be doing something like this in his room? Would Ain's partners get mad at him? Isn't this, like, something he'd have to talk to them about first? Isn't it severely fucked up to do this when their friend is still missing? Why... is he doing this? He gave some stupid excuse, but it's not really adding up.

Does he like Ain?

He stops mere centimeters from Ain's lips, enough that he'll feel Elsword's breath, but no more than that. He just flusters more, and his head pulls back after a few too-long seconds. ]

Ah, I guess... this is just something else I'm not very good at.

[mmmmMmMmMMMMm he loves you so much, Elsword—

Ain smiles, running his fingertips through Elsword's hair now. The other hand slides down to his chest, for Reasons, as he bonks their foreheads together and nuzzles their noses together. He cannot believe he isn't the most nervous one in the room, suddenly... maybe it's because he's kissed so many guys since he's come here.]

Are you nervous? Do you wanna talk about it?

[Ain would say something cheeky like "I don't bite" but uhhh he might bite.]

You don't have to be good at it, you know.

N-no, not nervous. [ Beat. ] There's some nerves, but it's not like, the main thing, I think. I don't know, it's just... it's very... swimmy? I guess. [ Bro, what does that even MEAN. ]

I... I guess it's not a big deal, because it's not your first kiss, but it's still... special, right? [ Someone please teach this man about relationships so he can stop talking about them like he's 13. ] It's still hard to believe that... I saw you not all that long ago, and now you're engaged and have partners and... I'm sure Add and Ciel and Raven would all be good kisses for you still, but [ Not Me ] it's selfish for me to ask this, I'm realizing...

[Ah, Ain understands the swimmy emotion perfectly, actually. This is his language. He knows the exact vibe without knowing the word for said vibe... emotions sure are difficult.]

Every kiss I get to share with someone is special, though. Especially with you.

[Like yes, he would give the others full tongue if they were here, but they're not — Add is especially not — technically here. They're in his dreams... he can make out with them in his dreams but someone might walk in and see him having gay hallucination makeouts with the goddamn air and ask questions, so.

Not the point. Ahem.]

I don't know if it is or isn't selfish... that's not really something I considered when you asked. But I want to kiss you, and I want you to kiss me, [and Ain wants Elsword to be in love with him, too,] so if that's considered selfish, I'm okay if you want to be.

[ Elsword doesn't analyze this too much. Instead, he just says perhaps the stupidest thing uttered by man. ]

Oh, be careful, Ain. If you say stuff like that, it makes it sound like you love me.

...yes.

[Just. Deadpan. He's not sure how he expected his eventual-one-day love confession to Elsword to go, if he did it at all — if they were still on Elrios he probably would've taken this to his grave — but it definitely was never like this.]

That's... that's what I'm trying to say. I'm not doing a good job of it... but I do. I have for a long time.

[ Excuse him. Elsword.exe has crashed. There's a long pause as Elsword, like, tries to analyze this. Like, maybe Ain is lying, or maybe Ain is teasing him, or maybe like 700 other things?? But he doesn't think Ain to be cruel. He can say some really out of pocket stuff, but even so, this is...

.......................

Elsword doesn't say anything for the longest time. His hands are still on Ain's face and he's just, y'know, staring at him. After a time, he very quietly lets out a Single Vowel. ]

…Eh?

I—

[Well now Ain is sitting up and scrambling to explain himself, somehow, as if he has to justify I have feelings for you to a guy who has obliviously been running a polycule for five years. Ain's cheeks are red-red, and he quickly grabs his crossed ankles with his hands as his gaze darts literally anywhere but Elsword's face.]

It's— it's not like it's hard to fall in love with you...! You're fantastic and you're always there for others, for me, and it... I... I've really always loved you, so... I don't know, you were the first person I ever got romantic feelings for. I didn't say anything at the time because I didn't really understand what being attracted to someone felt like until I was already here.

[ Hey, no, don't go?? Elsword's hands just linger in the space Ain was, staring at him dumbfounded. He likes Elsword? Elsword???? The one who's fucked up most in the party?

He stays quiet, but only because there's a hundred things that he wants to say. "Sorry" and "Why?" and "I think I like you too" and "I don't know what I'm feeling either because I don't really understand this stuff well either" and "How come I haven't noticed?" and "Is all this really okay if that's how you feel?" and "Oh fuck, is THAT why we were married?" and- ]

I don't... really do any of that stuff well enough, though... [ And what he says is the dumbest of all! Huzzah- ]

[...boy, Add has fucked up way more than you have. Ain is keeping track why do you ask—]

You— [Elsword what do you MEAN.] You're the glue that's holding all of us together. Whenever something goes wrong, or someone's having a bad day, it's your energy that brings us all back.

[Yes, Ain has given advice to Eve and Ara before, but Ain wouldn't say he's good at advice. He just has experience in making choices that no one should have to make.]

I think you're pretty harsh on yourself... you're doing all you can, and that's what we care about the most as a collective, I think.

[ Ouuggh... that's putting a lot of faith in Elsword. He doesn't want to let Ain, or anyone else down. But that's right. He has to keep the party together. He has to keep up with himself. He can't leave or forget anyone, if he's learned anything from Genesis.

But what if he keeps messing up? How much more can everyone else handle before they realize how off-brand of a glue Elsword is???? He squeezes his hands together. He has to get better. He has to be better.

He sits upright, squishing Ain's cheeks with his hands again to get him to face Elsword, and then he just... very gently presses his lips to Ain's.

This is probably something Elsword still wanted, but more than that, he hopes it makes Ain happy. He knows he's dealing with so much right now, and he deserves to be happy. ]

[Ain makes the littlest "mmrp" sound when their lips connect, like a surprised kitten. Oh, God, his nerves. They only slightly melt away now that they're actually kissing again, mostly because Ain isn't sure if he said enough. How does he explain to Elsword that he just loves him for who he is, and mistakes and perceived slights don't really matter? Maybe just by saying that?

He puts his hands on Elsword's shoulders... the armour is in the way, so they slide down to his chest eventually instead.]

[ World's clumsiest love confession into the world's clumsiest kiss. Sorry, Ain. Elsword isn't... the worst kisser, but he's a little awkward. Stiff. Less out of nerves and more from inexperience. He ends up bumping their noses together, and realizing he needs to tilt his head. He learns it is a little more than just pressing their lips together, and that he has to actually move his lips and not just like... keep them there. Just a little. Maybe more than just a little is a little more than just "kissing".

It only lasts about four whole seconds before Elsword parts with the tiniest pop sound.

...

........

And then he leans in for another. Then another. And another.

Mwah mwah mwah. ]

[When two touch-starved idiots collide...

Ain actually starts giggling the longer this goes on, especially between each little kiss. It makes it hard to actually focus on the act of kissing proper, but maybe that's easier for both of them, nervous as they are. It doesn't need to be perfect, after all.

Knowing where the snaps on Elsword's pauldrons are helps this out immensely, though, because as they share little pecks and giggles, Ain is taking those off so he can actually properly throw his arms around Elsword's neck moments after. A full embrace.]

Elsword~ hehe~.

[Smooch smooch, peck peck.]

[ He will stop, eventually, but then just hold Ain to him in a hug that he will tell himself is for Ain. It's not. He's… happy, he thinks? Like, he misses Add. He wants to go home. But in this moment, it's… mmh, nice?

He's relaxed, at the very least. Something he doesn't do enough, if ever. ]

Um, so... do... I need to talk to your other partners? Like to ask them if... um... [ Elsword really out here like "do I have to ask for their blessing?" like he's asking a girl's dad if he can marry her. Like, yeah, talk to your partners, but also?? Boy??? ] O-or is that too forward?

[Meanwhile, Ain is climbing into Elsword's lap to sit on him and be as close as physical possible.]

Haha, you can, but they already know how I feel about you... it's not like I haven't talked about it. You have to be transparent about that sort of stuff in an open relationship like we all have. [You know, don't sell someone on an emotional connection before being like "hey I have 20 other emotional connections".] I'd like for all of you to get along, though, so don't feel shy talking to them~.

[You know unlike Add, whose first conversation with Wolfwood was a fight, as Ain would find out like a month later.]

You certainly don't have to worry about that...

[ Elsword is, y'know, the least shy person, he thinks. ]

I guess I just don't know how any of this works...? I mean, not even if there weren't others, I don't think? I guess I never thought about it. Is it nice? I have so many questions...

Haha, I'll try to answer all of them... but how about we go on a date? There isn't too much to do here, but anything can be a date if you take the time to make it fun, and just for us. The cafe has good food, and I know how much you like eating~.

[shut UP ain you eat all the pastries downstairs]

[ Elsword reaches up to rub Ain's back. It's honestly not all that weird to him having him in his lap. It's like barely a step removed from spooning your friends at night. Which Elsword has yet to be told is a weird thing to do, so, uhhhhhhh- ]

I... love your enthusiasm, Ain. But... I'm still... [ What's the word he's looking for here? He thinks on it a moment. ] ...absorbing this all? It's a lot to take in. I mean, I don't know how I didn't realize...

...

Anyway, not saying "no", just... not right now?

Haha, not right now, then.

[Yeah someone should probably tell Elsword that it's weird to spoon your friends at night, but then again the whole group wants to rail him stupid so... no one's going to have this conversation. Surely Raven thinks it's funny when Elsword is jetpacking??]

So, what's on your mind now?

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